Nobody Knows

Robin Williams

Nothing seems clearer.

As I sit in front of the mirror.

In my dressing room’s darkness.
A knock shouts, “10 minutes!”

Years of laughs and cheers!
There’s a part of me living in tears.

Crowds coming to see me every night. An illusion is their only sight.

They see me smile and laugh a lot. On the outside you may think, I’m happy with the life I’ve got.

There’s a part of me nobody will ever see.

A part of me who isn’t who he wants to be.

The ache is so deep.
There are times I can hardly breathe.

I’m not the money, or the fame. I’m not the one who’s got it made.

Fortunes coming in like the wind blows. So much money, how could I ever say no?

Movies and magazines were my scene. My life was just make believe.

What will be waiting for me at my life’s end?

Will I reflect back and remember moments with my real friends?

Finding my way, in a moment, I would give this all away!

“5 minutes!”
Crowds cheer to see it all!
As I drown my life in sadness all alone.

So many places and towns.
My crazy world just keeps going round.

Flying cross the sky’s, wishing I could close my eyes and die.

Another 747, just beyond the wings I would jump to find my Heaven.

Getting so caught up, in pretending to be something I’m not.

Feeling so alone at the top.

Wishing there was a way to scream and stop!

So many lessons learned.

So many left me to burn!

“It’s time!” As I awake from a dream fantasized,
that has never materialized.

Walking out the door, been here 1,000 times before.

Quietly I whisper “No.”

Wishing there was another place left to go…

I want to run from all the lights, as the crowds cheers come into sight.

So many reaching arms, I find it so hard to smile and keep calm.

Rows of 100’s seated high above.

Crowds waving,
yet I feel no love.

Full house, I can’t imagine!

This pain, I can barely manage.

Holding back tears on the stage about to begin.

Wishing this would all end.

Looking at me you’d think I stand strong.

Yet my presence feels so small.

Fans cheer and soar, as my heart screams in torture!

They can’t believe they are there,
as I live this quiet nightmare!

Hundreds who couldn’t make it in, stand outside.

As I silently plan my suicide.

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